Little Red Riding Hood, A Feudal Fairytale!
by MoonlightDragon888
Summary: The Inu gang are bored one day so Shippou decides to do a play of Little Red Riding Hood! The only problem now are the outtakes... hehe... Rated T for profanity COMPLETE!
1. Prolouge

**_Prolouge_**

The Inu gang was bored.Kagome couldn't sense any shikon-no-kakeras lately either. " I have an idea! " Shippou cried happily, " Let'sdo a play or.. whatever Kagome said about in her time about the fairytale of Little Red Riding Hood! "

" Hey that's a good idea Shippou! " Kagome replied. " Keh! " Inuyasha scoffed, " Sounds like baby stuff to me! "

" Inuyasha... " Kagome warned, " Uhhh... oops?... " Kagome took a deep breath, " **_OSUWARI!_** "

**WHAM!

* * *

**" Okay everyone! Here is the cast! " Kagome happily announced, " CAST? " Inuyasha panicked, " Did you break any body part? " Kagome giggled, " No! It's just a production member crew list! "

**Cast**

**Rin-_Little Red Riding Hood_**

**Sesshomaru**_-**The** **Hunter**_

**Koga-_The Wolf_**

**Kagome-_Little Red Riding Hood's Mother_**

**Kaede-_Little Red Riding Hood's Grandmother_**

**Inuyasha-_Hunter's Dog_**

**Sango-_Director_**

" What the hell Kagome? " Inuyasha screeched, " Why did you have to put me as a dog & add in my pathetic-excuse for a brother & the mangy wolf! "

" They're perfect for the part! I'll look for Koga & Kaede, Sango, can you go for Sessomaru & Rin? " Kagome requested, " Sure Kagome! "

* * *

" Tell me again _why _you called Rin & I? " Sesshomaru asked in his usual monotone voice. " I told you, we're having a play called ' Little Red Riding Hood ' and you & Rin are perfect for the leading parts! " Kagome explained annoyed.

" Weeeellll... alright but only because my pathetic-excuse for a half-brother is my servant. " Sesshomaru agreed reluctantly. " KEH! Enjoy it while you can you bastard! " Inuyasha said angrily.

( A/N; Wow... talk about brotherly love... )

" How come _I _can't be the director? " Miroku whined, " _That's _because you'd only announce lecherous things and ruin the whole thing! " Sango yelled. " Anyway, let's get started! " Kagome smiled.

* * *

I hope you all like the first chappie:) Anyway, gotta go! My mom's friend's son is complaining about me hogging the computer. Bye my fellow readers! R & R!


	2. Kouga You Baka!

**_Chapter 1_**

**Sango-**Once upon a time in a small forest, was a small cottage. The people who resided in it were Little Red Riding hood & her mother. One day, Little Red Riding Hood's mother had to tellher daughter something important.

**Kagome-**Little Red Riding Hood, your grandmother is sick. You need to take these treats & goodies to her.

**Rin-**Sure! Can I eat one on the way?

**Sango-_CUT!_**

Rin panicked, " _Who's_ cut? Who's bleeding? " Sango assured her, " Relax! ' Cut means ' Stop! ' in movie talk! Rin, don't say that last line and follow the script ok? "

**Sango-**Scene 1! Take 2! Aaaaaannnndddd... **ACTION**!

* * *

**Rin-**Ok! 

**Kagome-**Remember to stick to the path and don't speak to the strangers ok?

**Rin-**Alright!

**Sango-**Unfortunately, Little Red Riding Hood wasn't a very good listener & went off course to pick flowers for her grandmother. On the way, she met a particular hungry wolf.

**Kouga-**Hello little girl, what's your name?

**Rin-**What are you talking about Koga? You know who I am! Geez! And I thought that _I _had a short memory!

**Sango-_CUT!_**

**Kouga-**What did I do?

**Sango-**Not you! Rin!

**Kouga-**Oh, you mean the brat.

Sesshomaru was pissed. " What did you say? " He demanded, eyes turning red. Koga, being the idiot that he is repeated, " Oh, you mean the brat. " That was it. Sesshomaru lunged at Kouga.

**Sango-**Stop! Stop you 2!

Kagome, being the smart one,

( Unlike _some _people... -glaring at Kouga- )

decided to set the camera & ask Shippou to put it on stand by. Unfortunately, Suppou took it too literally and made a sign that said;

**Children ages under 15, please stand by... even me...**

* * *

Well that's it for_ this_ chappie! I'm so proud of this chapter for some reason... -sniff- anyway, gotta go! It's late! remember my fellow readers, Read & Review!P.S, inuyasha-rox-1, thanks for putting me in your favs section considering that chapter was the first:)


	3. Pilsbury, My Heart To Yours!

**! _WARNING! OOC-NESS AHEAD! _!**

Just to make things clear... hehe... LOL

* * *

**_Chapter 2_**

**Sango-**Scene 2! Take 2! Aaaaaaaaannnnnnndddddd... **ACTION**!

* * *

**Rin-**My name's Little Red Riding Hood! 

**Kouga-**Mmmmmm... something smells good... what's in the basket?

**Rin-**Treats & goodies for my sick grandmother!

**Kouga-**May I have one?

**Rin-**Sure! Here you go!

**Kouga & Rin ( singing )-**Pilsbury! My heart to Yours!

**( Baker Guy comes in )**

**Sango-_CUT!_**

" Ow! " Inuyasha cried covering his ears, ' This bitch is going to kill me today dammit! ' He thought.

**Sango-**Scene 2! Take 3! Aaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnddddddd... **ACTION**!

* * *

**Rin-**No! I cannot waste time! 

**Kouga-**Where does your grandmother live?

**Rin-**She lives at the end of that path behind you but there's a shortcut behind me!

**Kouga-**Oh! Very well then!

**( Runs for the path behind Rin )**

A few minutes later, you can hear a, " Yeow! What the &(:LO& _is_ this screaming metal death trap! "

" Oops! " Rin said rubbing the back side of her head sheepishly, " That was a shortcut alright, but to the Construction Lot! "

( A/N; If you're wondering if they even _have _Construction Lots in Feudal Japan, then sorry! I don't have a clue... but I don't give a _Damn!_ )

" _Why you..._ " Kouga snarled. " Don't you _dare _wolf... " Sesshomaru snarled back.

**Sango-**Don't you dare _both _of you! -flames of 7 Hells behind her eyes & all around her-

Sesshomaru & Kouga all straightened up, " Yes ma'am! "

**Sango-**Scene 2! Take 4! Aaaaaaaannnnnddddd... **ACTION**!

* * *

**Kouga-**Very well then!

**( Runs for the path )**

**Sango**-The shortcut lead exactly to Little Red Riding Hood's Grandmother's house just like she herself had said and knocked on the door.

**( Kouga knocked on the door )**

**Kaede-**Who is it?

**( Kouga in a girly voice )-**It's me, Little Red Riding Hood!

Everyone was laughing like there was no tomorrow. Kouga yelled angrily, " Shut up! "

**Sango-_CUT!_**

" Will... you... please... stop... doing... that?..." Inuyasha growled.

**Sango-**Anyway... Scene 3! Take 2! Aaaaaaaaannnnnnnddddd... **ACTION**!

* * *

Sorry! I decided to leave it for today. My hands are sore right now for doing Kumon & typing this thing at the same time... owie... thanks for your support! Keep the reviews coming! Ciao!


	4. The War of Racism! DUN! DUN! DUN! DUUUN!

**_Chapter 3_**

**Kaede-**Come in dear!

**_POW!_**

**Sango-_CUT, CUT, CUT & QUADRUPLE CUT!_**

" What did I do _this _time? " He yelled. " Don't pounce on Kaede dammit! " Sango screamed, " Honestly! "

' How did I end up surrounded by idiots?... ' She thought groaning.

**Sango-**Scene 3! Take 3! Aaaaaaaaaannnnnnnddddddddd... **ACTION**!

* * *

**Kaede-**Come in dear! 

**( Kouga barges in & stuffs Kaede in the closet )**

**Sango-**Much better!

**( Kouga dresses himself in the grandmother's clothes )**

Inuyasha & Sesshomaru were snickering at Kouga. Kouga decided to ignore them & let it go... _this _time anyway...

**( Rin knocks on the front door )**

**( The door falls down )**

**_BAM!_**

**Sango-_CUT! RIN! DON'T KNOCK ON THE DOOR THAT HARD! UGH!_**

Shippou knew what to do;

**Everybody please stand by due to construction... K+** ****

* * *

( Kouga in a old lady's voice )-Come in child!

**( Rin comes in )**

( A/N; Just to let you know, until the whole -ahem- ' grandmother talk is over, their thoughts would be like _this._ ( ) Oh by the way, Kouga, Sess &Rin are all OOC. Sorry!)

**Rin-**My grandmother! What big _ears_ you have! ( Mangy wolf! )

**Kouga-**The better to hear you with my dear! ( Delectible stuffed turkey! )

**Rin-**My Grandmother! What big _eyes _you have! ( Road-kill! )

**Kouga-**The better to see you with my dear! ( Horse dung! )

**Rin-**My grandmother! What big _teeth _you have! Hey Kouga! Did you get a dentist appointment? Because those incisors are _waaaaaaaayyyyyy _off the mark! Your dentist is a poor one by the way, you know that?

**Sango-_CUT! FOLLOW THE FRIKKN' SCRIPT PEOPLE! _**Scene 4! Take 2! Aaaaaaaannnndddddd... **ACTION**!**_

* * *

_Kouga-**The better to eat you with my dear! ( Human scum! )

**( About to eat Rin )**

Sesshomaru knocked out Kouga for that.

**Sango-_CUT! KNOCK IT OUT! BOTH OF YOU! URGH! KOUGA! DON'T EAT RIN FOR REAL! STUFF HER IN THE CLOSET LIKE YOU DID TO KAEDE!_**

Unfortunately, they all forgot Kaede who was in the closet locked up... oh the single life-span of irony.

**( Kaede in the closet thinking )-**_At this rate, they will suffocate_ _me and Kagome will have to call.. 9-1-1 or whatever that is and I will end up in the emergency room... that's it! I vow to never, EVER become part of these ' Plays ' ever AGAIN!_

Shippou knew immediately what to do... again.

**Children ages under _18 _please stand by... again... even me... again...**

**

* * *

**

**Kouga-**The better to eat you with my dear!

**( Stuffs Rin in the closet )**

**_BAM!_**

**( Sesshomaru busts in with the... erm... dart gun he got from Shippou... )**

**Sesshomaru-**En garde, you fiend! Now perish!

**_POP!_**

**( Kouga with the rubber dart on his chest )-**... I'm still _standing _here!

**Sango-_CUT! KOUGA! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO PRETEND YOU'RE DEAD YOU BAKA! _**Scene 5! Take 2! Aaaaaaaaaannnnnnnddddddd... **ACTION**!**

* * *

( Kouga faints )**

**( Sesshomaru opens the closet door )**

_**BAM! BAM! POW! WHAM!**_

**Sesshomaru-_OW! OW! OW! YEOW! RIN! OW! OLD HAG! OW! WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU OW! DOING! THAT'S OW! IT! THIS IS OW! THE OW! LAST TIME I OW! DO A GOOD HUMAN DEED EVER OW! AGAIN! OW!_**

**Sango-_CUT! RIN! STOP HITTING SESSHOMARU WITH YOUR BASKET & KAEDE! STOP HITTING SESSHOMARU WITH YOUR BOW DAMMIT!_**

" Ummmmm... " Everybody sweatdropped heavily & moved away slowly from the 3. " Errr... " Shippou began, " May I- "

" Go ahead Shippou. " Kagome finished firmly while covering her eyes from the HUGE graphic violence taking place.

**Children ages under 18 please stand by due to graphic violence... again...**

**

* * *

**Sorry! I'm ending it here for now! My hands are sore... again... owie!... _again... _I'm doing that alot aren't I? Well, gotta fly for dinner! Remember, R & R! Bye! 


	5. Epilouge

**I have to tell you, my friend inu-cla-hobs helped me with this! I thank ye!

* * *

**

**_Epilouge_**

**( Sesshomaru opens closet door )**

**Rin & Kaede-**Thank you Hunter!

**Sango-**The Wolf was killed by the hunter& everybody was happy. They all lived happily ever after. THE END!

Inuyasha thought happily, ' Well, at least the nightmare is over & not giving her voice out! '

**Sango-_CUT! _**That's a wrap!

' Scratch that thought! ' He considered. " Ok Shippou! You got the recording? " Sango asked. " Yep! Right here! " Shippou answered happily. " Wait a minute! Huh? What's this? " Miroku found a note that said;

**I hope you don't mind me taking _this...kukuku... _now we're even!**

" What? _Now we're even_? What's _that _supposed to mean? " Everybody shrugged and went on admiring their progress. They showed their play to the village children that day.

* * *

**Meanwhile at Naraku's Castle**

" Naraku, have you lost it? What's a vid-eo tape going to do to help us? " Kagura asked boringly. " Trust me Kagura. " Naraku assured, " Now _this _would be great black-mail material! Kukuku... Inuyasha, prepare to be humiliated as of today! Kukuku... "

( A/N; He laughs weird... OO )

**_Owari_**

* * *

I just want to say thanks, to inu-cal-hobs for helping me with this story & to my fellow readers & reviewers! Well, I hope you all like this fanfic! The outtakes are kinda corny, I know, but you have to admit, I.C.H & I make a great team! Well, ciao for now! 

**_Inu-Spyro-chan_**


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